From New York, under construction since 1957, its the

The day started with reveille at 3 am in So Portland, Maine. Showered, clothed and went through the packing list; triple checking that I had the four tickets; two of which came by way of a Letterman fan from Cleveland, who in the true alt.fan.letterman spirit provided them free of charge. Thanks again, Jack! At 4 am we picked up Dave and Debbie for the drive south. The obligatory stop for coffee was made at Dunkin Donuts. The effect of Fred's retirement showed in the lone counter person's helplessness in this rush of four orders. We were on the turnpike at 4:30 am.

Traffic was mild and the weather clear. Rush hour slowed us slightly in Hartford CT, and a small accident outside New Haven stopped us momentarily. At 8:30 am we pulled into Union Station in New Haven to catch the the 8:50 New York Express to Grand Central Station ($11 pp).

The train trip into the city is the most hassle free means of transport. Parking in Manhatten seems to hover around $5.50 per hour, so a day in the city can get expensive, not to mention the fact that the traffic sucks there. We had a brief slowdown as soon as we got into New York state when we came across a (this is not for the faint hearted). The train pulled into Grand Central at 10:30 am. From here it is a half hour walk to the Ed Sullivan Theater. Lunch was had a block down from the theater at Apple Jack's. I don't recommend it. Stale bread, warm beer, floury gravy.

After lunch, we stopped at Character's  next door to Rock America and waited for some sign of life at the theater. At noon, I walked over to the theater and there were people lined up at the ticket window inside. I asked a kid if they were trying for stand by and he said yeah. I returned at 12:30 and the line was gone, so I asked a page outside when the 2nd show tickets were going to be numbered, and he told me to go right in and they would take care of me.

Well, it seems that the tickets for the second show (taped Thursday, shown Friday night) weren't supposed to be sent out, as the show was reserved for freshman NYU students. The ticket women apologized and said they had been trying to reach the recipients and then gave me tickets to the first show. These she pre-numbered 104 -107. In contrast to my first visit where I had to wait in line outside the theater at 2 pm to number the tickets; it appears they now open the doors at 12 pm and you walk in to get them numbered or to obtain stand by. I spoke with two people who tried for stand by and they said they are now done by lottery rather than first come first served. Incidentally, they didn't get the tickets.

From here it was souvenier hunting at the Hard Rock Cafe, Planet Hollywood, and Harley Davidson Cafe.

At 4:30 we went to stand in line for entrance. This time we weren't given time to use the restrooms. We were however, given .

At 5:30 we were led in to the theater. The page led us down the center right aisle toward ignominity. Seeing a nice aisle seat inline with "Know Your Current Events", I told Debbie to go left. I followed and proceeded to tell Gina and Dave to follow but they got caught by the page. End result, Debbie and I, 8th row aisle, Gina and Dave 4th row center. The band was then introduced then Dave came out and spoke to the audience. A guy up front asked him if he wanted to race home, so Dave included that in his monologue, saying he was racing the audience home after the show. No ham was given out.

"Know Your Current Events" was very good. The highlight was Dave sorting through the cards after being told he was out of time and finding the one that said "Last Joke". This was where the unlucky women was subjected to a greasy hug by Richard Simmons. Honestly, when he ran down the aisle, the stink of oil followed him.

Drew Carey presented the top-ten list for the evening.

Next up was a short video entitled 'Urban Cop Patrol' featuring Dave and Paul as...well....cops.

First guest was Alec Baldwin starring with Anthony Hopkins in The Edge. You can tell right off the bat that him and Dave are friends.

Second guest was the star of CBS's Meego, Jonathan Lipnicki. Jonathan outdid Farrah in the looking out the window contest. Paul and the band showed him off stage with The Who's "The Kids are Alright"

Music was provided by Deana Carter. She played , "How do I get there?" off her CD "I shaved my legs for this." During the commercial break she played The Beatles, "Ruby Tuesday".

After the show it was a leisurely ride back to Grand Central in a cab with a   driver who had the usual unpronounceable name.